Saturday, April 05, 2008

Nitt-i-tude Test

Well this was also one post which should have come out earlier ,during my engg days at NIT Trichy. But better late than never.
Ever wondered whether you were really made for the campus. Maybe a separate grading system to measure the degree of ‘NITT’itude in you. Well, worry not!
Here’s is a set of questions, which demand absolutely no use of your hard-earned engg knowledge, so to speak and no test preparation. The grading system is in +’s and –‘s (I hope you understand, + means more and - is less).

1.At 8.30 in the morning you

a)Are in bed wondering which world are you in, trying hard to reach out for the irritatingly loud alarm clock. (+ 4)

b)Have finished Splashing deo all over your unclean body and wear the same T-shirt. (+10)

c)Are trying hard to recollect what your bicycle looks like while searching for it among the ones fallen down… (-1)

d) realize you don’t have one and look for someone else to give you a lift (-2)

e)Are in the classroom, prancing to and fro, waiting for the teacher to come (-50)

2. In class you normally

a)Fight with the others for the first bench and then sit down to take notes (-100)

b)Are relishing "Tiger" biscuits, sitting in the last row. (+ 10)

c)Are halfway through ‘5 point Someone’. (+15)

d)...And the prof catches you(-15)

e)Wake up just in time for the attendance call.(+20)

f)Irritate the guys sitting beside you by pretending to enjoy the lecture and scribbling in your only book. (+100)

3. In the Octa User lab you generally:

a) Go to the SUN user lab. (-5)

b)... By mistake (-1)

c)Search for your name in the placement site (list of placed students) even 3 months after your placement and get happy once more. (+ 5)

d)Check the online silver notice board for the (supposed)movie in the trical audi, the next Saturday. (-10)

e) Do programming (-∞)

f)Play "Stick-cricket" for 2 hours on the trot (0 if you don’t have a PC in your hostel room, -20 if u have one)

g) Take printouts of your topper’s assignments (+25)

4. In the College Internet lab you:

a) Are trying hard to achieve your longtime goal of 20000 scraps, 800 friends, and 1 fan. (+2)

b) Read the online edition of ‘The Hindu’. (-50)

c) Open wikipedia and start mugging pages for the forthcoming inter-college quiz. (-100)

d) Memorize names of US universities and their disciplines (- 5)

e) Search for your house verandah on google earth (-∞)

f) Piss off the people waiting for their turn by playing the irfan pathan hat-trick on Youtube at least 10 times.(-15)

g) Annoy your 'neighbours' by playing the your favourite hindi song at full blast on your elephant earphones.(- 200 )

5. In the college mess you are:

a) Discussing your CAT scores (-50)

b) Draining out the excess oil from the curry (+15)

c) Working out strategies for CounterStrike (+25)

d) ...Which you started playing yesterday (-125)

e) Fighting with the mess-anna for an extra gulab jamun. (-5)

f) Searching for the paneer in the panner-parathaa, wondering why it is called so. (+ 500)

g) …And you find it at last (+ 1000)

6. The first thing you did after placements was

a) Nursed your battered n bruised backside, due to the 'love' showered on you by your dear friends. (+10)

b) Rushed to the ATM, to treat your friends. (+20)

c) Went to octa internet lab and changed your orkut profile name and used the company logo as ur display pic. (-5)

d) Wondered how many girls would be with you in the company. (-6)

e) Made a face as though you expected to screw up the interview and start boasting on how you overcame all odds. (+1 if less than 10 people got thru along with you, - 100 if more than 50 got thru)

g) Tried to look sad and forlorn over the company's pay package. (-200)

7. According to you, the library

a) Is a place where you sit and study, refer or take books from. (-1000…)

b) Is a place where you get to see,touch and feel rare, centuries-old manuscripts without even having to pay entry fee. (+5)

c) Cough, Cough, Aaaa..Aaaa.. Choo!!! (+ 1000)

d) Er..i don’t know. I am still asking people for directions (+15)

e) Library, you said?? (Long pause).. Is it some kind of a zodiac sign??? (+16)

8. Which of the following would you become, if (god forbid) you werent
recruited in the campus placements?

a) The xerox shop anna: Ever-ringing cash counters (+100)

b) The Gate Anna(Roadside dhaba): I wont need to give any second invitation to my customers. (+200)

c) The Bru shop anna: Night time is the right time. (+ 50)

d) The only stationery shop anna: Monopoly rules (+25)

e) The laundry anna: As long as no one bathes, its business all the way for me. (+ 20)

f) Become treasurer or Co-treasurer for one of the college fests. (+ 10)

9. In case you answered (a) to the above Question what will your future plans be?

a) Buy the library and convert it into "The central Xerox center". (+ 5)

b) Have a lifetime membership facility for regular customers. (+18)

d) Offer special gifts for the ones who duplicate material for more than 100 bucks
Per day. (+ 12)

e) "Buy one get one free" offers and festival discounts (+ 4)

f) Set up branches in the respective hostels itself (+ 1)

10. If your answer to the first Question was (b) what would your plans be?

a) Rechristen it. Give it a Fundoo name. ("Chill Gates" sounds much more appealing as opposed to plants, bamboo shoots, bananas,leaves etc) (+1)

b) Have my Best menu on the Saturday nights (??), at low costs, knowing that the mess food on Saturdays sucks bigtime. (+ 15)

c) Special placement-season offers. A 30% discount for guys offering their first-job treats and 50% discount for second-job treats. (GPA and pay-scale no criteria) (+25)

d) Have a credit card, I mean, "I-card" system,! (+ 26)

e) Obtain a patent for a new product called "Dew lime". (+1000)

11. If your answer to question one was (e), what would your plans be?

a) Launch a door-to-door delivery service. (-20)

b) Teach the hostel boys the virtues of cleanliness, washing and bathing (-100)

c) Stop interchanging clothes (+ 2)

d) Start recruiting boys and give them training. (-1)

Check your score and reply asap.




«AM» said...

Nice one mate! Too good... I got a +1153 thanks to cumulative counting and that CS-in-mess option,otherwise it would have definitely been negative.... ha!

Bhaskar Prabhakar said...

Awesome post..did not bother calculating..but a good one!

Rach said...

GOD... haven't read something so funny in a loooooooong time :)

Didn't bother calculating or anything, but the whole quiz was damn cool!!.... stil can't stop laughing!!

Keep Blogging.....Cheers!!

Bee'morgan said...

Hi Vichooo.. after a long time I felt like reading this post again.. somehow, I was reminded of this on my way to office today.. at last after crossing many of your tempting posts, I reached here.. it is as refreshing as ever man.. I felt the same hilarious effect which i got, on my first reading. :-) Thanks for such a good post..

Kalyan said...

Gr8 blog vichu and sorry for the late comment.. I am getting 2000+ and was stopped at the 8th one(wer my ans was f).
And again thanks for making us to think abt the college after a year..

Anonymous said...

Nice one.. In class and after placements were fabulous.. :)

sagar said...

nice blog dude
sooo true! :P