Sunday, October 04, 2009

Corporate culture

As I swipe my card and enter the brightly-lit, plush office which wears its corporate aura yet again at the dawn of a new day; I hear the usual phone calls, telecon sessions, vendor bashing, shortages,inventories, feasability talk, cost,quality,delivery,dispatch,...poooh.

But yet I somehow feel out of place.

Then I walk to where my work cubicle is and I fail to identify which one is mine (especially if everything's in the right place).
Not surprising if you are travelling half the month.

And then the boss/bosses notice that they havent seen me for ages and just as I put my back-side to rest and attempt to seat myself conmfortably, there is invariably an interrogation session around the corner.

Good morning. Where have you been? Long time, yaar!!" Trying their utmost to sound like long-lost pals at their cheerful and calming best, as if I had just returned from a vacation in Disneyland.

Where have you been??
You ought to know where I have been since its you who delegates work and you get paid for doing it, right?

" Sir, I had to attend to some pending development issues in of "A" project at "X" supplier in "B"city and then had to rush off all of a sudden to Y vendor."
(Damn supplier X & Supplier Y. They could easily win oscars for spoiling some else's holiday!)

Then what follows is a full-on, 10-minute verbal report of X & Y vendors.
The verbal report serves its purpose of calming any unfound fears, if there were any,that I was on a paid holiday under the pretext of "official" duty.

" So, developments on in full swing, huh?" cuts in one of the other bosses who it seems is having a field day with no work to do.
(That, these days, seems a very common phenomenon since the "delegating" job doesnt take much time.)

Weekends for are at a premium these days!
And if there ever was a long one,
(A long weekend for me is a non-working Saturday & Sunday)it invariably does end up in travel within town.
The previous weekend had come came with its share of travails. Not that it bothered me much since I had just completed a 3-day soujourn of Chennai & Nashik.

Friday was supposed to be a half-day which ended up being a hectic full-day thanks to "What's Your Rashee?". As it was, the only two things that seemed intresting were priyanka and the ttitle track. (The guy who recommended the movie was lucky enough to escape getting bashed up or paying a re-fund to the 12 of us who went for it carrying high hopes.).
And then we waited, with bated breaths & increased desperation,for what we call as the "honeymoon" period.
Yes you heard it right!
The Sept-to-Nov period is what i call the "honeymoon" period for most employees. Usually peppered with a series of festivals, it easily qualifies as the most unproductive season of the financial year as far as work is concerned.
Most blokes wouldnt care working just weeks before the festivities begin, since its the "run up-to-the-event" time and no one's in the "mood" to slog.
And guess what? No one's prepared to work after the fun gets over, since they are yet to shake off the festive "mood" (hangover as some may call it)!!

Good god, such strange ways of keeping away work! (Just say "No", that will do!)